CAIRNS

Cairns is warm and fun, and also funky, friendly and just nice to be in.

However, I have to tell you that Cairns Domestic Airport is quite possibly the silliest airport in the world. You may recall the dreadful problems we had there last year while it was being built, and I have to tell you that, a year later, now finished, it's only slightly better than it was.

The main problem is the exceptionally silly terminal. Everything about the layout and logistics of the structure  is counter-intuitive, against all rhyme and reason, because nothing happens the way you expect it to happen ... no, it's worse than that because I'd even go so far as saying that everything seems to actively work against the process of what's meant to be happening in there. 

Anyway, after negotiating our way through this endlessly abject stupidity, we decided that the airport builders were very definitely delivered the wrong plans by the architects ... and had great fun trying to work out what structure's plans the builders mistakenly given instead.

And the answer we came up with is that Cairns Domestic Terminal is actually built from the plans for a Government Health Department cattle dip because the building really would work if your intention is removing ticks from domestic cattle.

But once you're through this cattle dip, Cairns is just endlessly nice. Blue skies, blue seas, and green, green mountains of only slightly damaged rainforests. (We didn't see the horrendous damage from Cyclone Yasi until we got further south.) And after Sydney's freezing rain, the warmth was so very welcome.

Baby Jane picked us up, which was so sweet of her ... and the plan was that, because we arrived two days before Talei arrived back from Manila, to save Jane having to make two journeys, we'd just hang around Cairns being silly-as and having fun until Talei arrived, and then we'd all drive down to Innisfail together, and that is indeed what happened.

As I've already mentioned, I missed Rose's farewell party due to bloody Mainland China - yeah, it's all their fault!!! - being such a stupidly officious and mean-spirited country ... but the others all went and had a fabulous time dancing to a really great live Gypsy Jazz band. I have no idea what Gypsy Jazz is, but Rose always has interesting musician friends and they always have interesting music so I'm sorry I missed it.

Rose - Baby Jane's dearest friend in FNQ - is off to India to do volunteer work among the poor.  It's something her soul is crying out to do so we support her in this although Baby Jane says she's going to miss her so very much, but that didn't stop the party being great fun.

So they had great fun at the party while I ... OK, I had fun too.  After blogging, I had a massage and then sat out in a street cafe and watched the world go by, all the while reveling in the warmth!

Yes, finally, we were finally warm. Daily, despite it being the heart of winter, the temperature was 26c and it'd only fall to 20c at night.  Nice. So nice, Woody and Buzz decided to sleep in the park next to the Esplanade to save money ... which they tried to do only they were spotted by a young woman who offered them a bed for the night in exchange for sex.  No, seriously. I thought things like that only happened in teenage boy fantasies and Penthouse Forum, but it actually happened to the two young Frenchmen who are currently Baby Jane's WOOFERS!  But that's Cairns, la!!

The city is so relaxed and laid-back, and has evolved such a distinct style you too long to dress all funky and Boho and get piercings and tattoos and wear jewelry made out of shells and coconuts. In fact, I was so impressed by Far-North-Queensland's now fully evolved Troppo-Boho-style I got myself bright baggy pants  and I've been wearing them ever since with tight little singlet tops  ... and ugg boots.

Yup, I know I said I never would, but I have to confess I'm now wearing ugg boots. It was either that or getting my tongue pierced.

Oh dear. I've barely scratched the surface of our Cairns jaunt, and now Keith wants to use the computer so I'll have to come back later and tell you more.