What Kills Us This Week!

Ever since that visiting sociologist named the possible reason for HKers tendency to large-scale panic over stupid things as the result of a deeply ingrained biophobia, I'm no longer finding this tendency to Ahhh Threatdown! either funny or cute!

The latest has just made me cross. Two things:

1) Here in HK, we're on full Level 6 Pandemic Mode for H1N1. That's the highest the scale goes! Since no one is dying from this early strain of Swine Flu - folks are saying they've had colds that were worse - this really makes a mockery of Level 6, doesn't it! What happens when this strain morphs into the killer variety (my prediction is March next year!)? We'll have to call it Triple AAA Superplus Level 6!

But the thing that actually does worry me here is that Australia is currently developing the vaccines and they're breeding them in chicken eggs and since HK scientists have proven that Avian Flu gets into chicken eggs and no one in Oz is checking for it in the eggs they're using, I'm thinking that THIS is exactly how Avian Flu will breed with Swine Flu and thereby start this hideous killer pandemic everyone's talking about. You'll forgive me, won't you, if I choose NOT to get vaccinated.

I'm also hoping I catch this early strain because they're saying that folks who get it now will be naturally vaccinated against the killer strain ... so cough on me, everyone! Please!!!

2) Three girls were caught using ketamine at one of the local schools and HK again went crazy, and now they're introducing random drug testing at all the schools. It started out as "compulsory", but then Civil Libertarian Lawyers got on the case and said they legally couldn't, so now the schools are saying it'll be voluntary ... only they'll expel any student who doesn't!

Since HK Law is based on British Law, in which everyone is "assumed innocent until proven guilty" - and I will fight for this principle because I believe in it - you can see why I'm so cross about it! We obviously need a little more action by those nice Civil Libertarian Lawyers!

And I'm also worrying about the legality of accompanying a kid into the toilet to watch them pee into a cup! I'm a high school teacher myself and I know this is a real no no! Such a no no, it simply can't be done! So, mmmm, guess there's about to be a big market for piss in our fair city.

Was going to make a joke about how HK kiddies are big into ace-ing tests and how this one will be no different, but it's so obvious I'll let it pass!

So those are the two areas of stupidity that HK is currently all Ahhh Threatdown about!

But there's a real reason for panic in the background which everyone is ignoring ... possibly because it's something from the "too hard basket": HK police uncovered a possible Mainland Chinese plot to assassinate Martin Lee and Jimmy Lai.

If you don't already know, Martin Lee is like the Atticus Finch (the father in "To Kill a Mockingbird") of HK politics: a totally decent, honourable, moral man who works quietly behind the scenes for HK Democracy. Jimmy Lai is the more flamboyant publisher of "Apple Daily", the Chinese language pro-Democracy newspaper.

Guess Mainland China wants pay-back for our Tiannaman Square Massacre Vigil three weeks ago! That means my choice this week has to be:

THREATDOWN

Immature politics up North!